“Why does toxic sex feel so good?” someone once asked me.
…
The person who you know isn’t good for you (they’re taken, abusive, manipulative, emotionally unavailable, etc).
The sex that comes after a big fight when you make up.
The f*cking that feels like an addiction so strong you’re willing to give up your resistance, pride, morals, integrity and all else for it.
…I felt was what he meant by that question.
In Astrology, the North and South nodes are the intersection of the paths of the Sun and the Moon (masculine/feminine) at the time one is born. The North Node represents what one’s soul aspires to, and the South Node represents what one’s soul is leaving behind.
In Vedic Astrology Rahu and Ketu represent a similar concept, though more deeply. The kundalini energy from Rahu raises from the root of one’s being to unite with Ketu at the crown; this is the process of self-realization or enlightenment.
The south node is an accumulation of a soul’s past life karma and represents its natural tendencies - what has been done over and over for many lifetimes that the soul is learning to overcome.
Relationships and especially sexual relationships are magnetic attractions that give the soul an opportunity to work out its past life karmas and learn new information that can push a person past their old conditioning, habits, beliefs and behaviors.
On a spiritual level, this attraction has nothing to do with how pleasant it feels or how easy the relationship is. All that matters is that the soul is being attracted to what it needs to in order to evolve.
Often the most growth comes from these extremely polarized and magnetic relationships. Our bodies are almost like North and South Node (poles) energies attracting opposite energies that are also learning their own soul lessons.
You will attract people that represent South Node energies, aka karmic situations, that can feel painful, triggering, unpleasant and everything you need in order to bring to your awareness the lessons you need to learn and develop within yourself internally.
Until one learns these lessons, and integrates the new energy into their being, the person they are attempting to escape will be an ever present magnetic pull. The sex that happens with a highly charged South Node energy is intelligently designed to pull you into the contrast of experiencing your soul lessons.
The choice within these situations is often, continue to give in and experience momentary pleasure and prolonged pain, or accept and transcend to experience momentary pain and true pleasure.
We are like magnets that are continuously attracting what we unconsciously hold within our spirits, and the universe sends us situations and relationships to make all that is unconscious within us become conscious.
Relationships with people are the most potent learning opportunities our spirits can have, and sex is the most potent learning activity a spirit can engage in.
It’s all just a part of the universe’s design.
That is why it feels so good.